You Were There. And Then

when my alarm for my medicine went off this morning, I was so warm and comfortable, snuggled next ti you. Then I turned the alarm off, and turned back over, to a cold and empty bed.

I wondered where you had gone.
Then I remembered that you have been gone for a very long time.
And an even longer time since we could snuggle in the bed, since you couldn't breathe lying down.

So why would I think that?
Was it a dream?
A dream remnant?

Was it just warmth and comfort?
If so, did I conjured it up for myself, or was the loving warmth coming from you?

I don't know.
I'll never know.

What I do know is that in that moment between sleeping and waking, the bed got colder and bigger and emptier.

I miss you.