I didn't realize how much you actually did do to take care of me, in our day-to-day. I've made a couple of interesting discoveries there.
For one thing, yes, I will forget to eat, or put off eating until I am actually too weak to cook. Wish you were here to remind me, as you always did. I used to get so annoyed with you! "Do I look like I forget to eat?"
Guess what.
Not only do I really forget to eat, I still look the same. Haven't lost any weight from not eating. May have gained a pound or ten. (My weight is still bouncing between 260 and 270.) I know, it makes no sense to me either. And there's no sense in going to Dr. You know they will just say I must be wrong about that, because one only gains weight by eating too much and doing too little.
I miss you tying my shoes, too. After you helped me get my socks over my toes, which are so very far away from my hands. How did I never realize that you were helping me to dress myself? I feel so ashamed sometimes that I took that help for granted. I was under the delusion, I suppose, that I could do it for myself, it was just easier to ask you.
Not exactly a delusion. I can do these things for myself, but it takes a whole lotta work!
And this isn't exactly a taking care issue, but I thought you might like to hear me acknowledge that you were absolutely right when you said I could go for days without speaking to anyone. A recent bout of laryngitis proved that true. I went several days without talking to anyone.
The hardest part of laryngitis was not being able to shout out the answers on Jeopardy!
So, I miss you in a hundred little day-to-day ways. There's no surprise in that. We had so many hundreds of day to day days. Until you ran out of days, and mine continue on.
Until we meet again, sweetheart.
For one thing, yes, I will forget to eat, or put off eating until I am actually too weak to cook. Wish you were here to remind me, as you always did. I used to get so annoyed with you! "Do I look like I forget to eat?"
Guess what.
Not only do I really forget to eat, I still look the same. Haven't lost any weight from not eating. May have gained a pound or ten. (My weight is still bouncing between 260 and 270.) I know, it makes no sense to me either. And there's no sense in going to Dr. You know they will just say I must be wrong about that, because one only gains weight by eating too much and doing too little.
I miss you tying my shoes, too. After you helped me get my socks over my toes, which are so very far away from my hands. How did I never realize that you were helping me to dress myself? I feel so ashamed sometimes that I took that help for granted. I was under the delusion, I suppose, that I could do it for myself, it was just easier to ask you.
Not exactly a delusion. I can do these things for myself, but it takes a whole lotta work!
And this isn't exactly a taking care issue, but I thought you might like to hear me acknowledge that you were absolutely right when you said I could go for days without speaking to anyone. A recent bout of laryngitis proved that true. I went several days without talking to anyone.
The hardest part of laryngitis was not being able to shout out the answers on Jeopardy!
So, I miss you in a hundred little day-to-day ways. There's no surprise in that. We had so many hundreds of day to day days. Until you ran out of days, and mine continue on.
Until we meet again, sweetheart.
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